The Oscilloscopic Emergency

    Venkat was analyzing graph on the screen carefully. It looked steady for now, but soon he realized, it wasn't so. It was starting to oscillate. the height of oscillations was increasing slowly for now, but he realized there wasn't much time before hell would break loose & calamity would strike.

    He was sweating profusely. Oh! how he wished if Doctor could come and help him now, but that was not going to happen so early. He knew Doctor would come only as per schedule. He looked outside window, it was dark and quiet out there. He felt totally helpless, alone and every passing moment started to instill fear in his mind.

    He tried to hold his nerve. "Everything isn't lost. I can still pull it out from here" he said to himself. He tried to recall the right cure for this problem. It was definitely somewhere in his memory, among all the things he had learned till date; or atleast thats what he was thinking.

    Finally he recalled few things. It calmed him a bit. He started applying all medicines in his stock one by one. None was working. Pressure was mounting again. He vaguely remembered about forced responses, if natural responses were not good enough, but he did not remember procedure for the same. He tried very hard to summon his memory, but it returned blank.

    Finally he gave up. Everything was lost. His whole career was melting before his eyes. All his dreams shattered. He was too young to deserve this fate, but at such a critical moment that was irrelevant. He was starting to break down.

    Then came a ray of hope. He saw Doctor walking towards him. He could only utter "Sir" before Doctor gave him a condescending look and yelled, "You dumbo! poles of transfer function must be on negative side of X axis. God knows what kind of electronics engineer you'll become. Now hurry up and correct it. External is coming your way." Professor walked away briskly to other student.

    Venkat changed signs of equation, replotted the graph and heaved a huge sigh of relief. System was stabilising now. Now he can go for placement interviews without any backlog.

                                                                                          काव्यानंद

Life of '.py'

Story of a python coder.

Abbreviations/nicknames/honours
Kernel : Python coder
Feku : Java coder
KK : PHP coder
Nachos : High class mac developer
Baba : Down to earth assembly coder and soldering technician
Kubez : Lazy tester
Lamb : Slang English dictionary
Milz : Host for these employed loafers

    The group of "employed loafers" gathered again at Milz's place. They started their routine by playing "Shehar ki ladki" and few "Vivah movie songs" and simultaneously ROFL'ing. Anticipating bhukkad (always hungry) people's hunger, Milz went to get breakfast for them.

    After the songs were finished, KK and Kubez started blabbering about KK's new Dubai se laya hua (bought from Dubai) phone. Lamb started doing sit-ups while Baba went a bit far and started eating roasted peanuts alone.

    KK started praying Java features of android when a sudden spark penetrated Lamb's mind; he woke up and shouted, "Java sucks and I hate coding."  "3 billion devices run on Java, kidhar hai tum (which age do you live in)?", Feku started his hydrabadi stream. KK interrupted, "Well, Java might be portable, but cool things you can do with PHP and Joomla are not there."

    "Kay chid-chid ahe (What is this annoyance)?", always-annoyed Kubez asked and looked at Baba, who was focusing on his peanuts like a meditating yogi. Feku took the opportunity and opened his mouth again, "Kayka PHP, ek bhindi nahi kat sakte tumhare PHP se (Useless PHP can't even cut a ladyfinger)."  "That reminds me, I have bhendichi bhaji (cooked ladyfingers) at my home today. Bye", Nachos exclaimed and jumped out of window on his bike, and disappeared.

    "First of all excuse me", now it was Kernel's turn, "but you are not considering python at all." "Python is snaky and slow language, as is the creature itself. Coding sucks, you people also suck.", Lamb blabbered and resumed his sit-ups.

    Feku, Kernel and KK started arguing about their favourite coding language in their own 'speaking' languages, when Baba finished his last peanut and interrupted. " 's the matter?", he asked in 'hydrabadi US' accent.

    "OK, so here's the solution. We'll give you a problem, you need to code it up in  a week. I'll write common execution framework, Nachos will write test cases and Kubez will do data entry. As usual Milz will arrange for food and Lamb will simply shut-up.", Baba put forth a testing concept. Nobody said anything for a while, and by self-proclaimed superiority, Baba finalized his decision.

                                                                                    (To be contd..)

                                                                                          काव्यानंद